Deep Breaths

It seems like I've been taking a lot of those the last few days, and when I'm not doing that, I find myself internally repeating the same phrase...


You can do this.  You can do this.  You can do this.


So, in about thirty more hours I'll have no choice but to do it.  I will wave goodbye to my comfortable American life of instant communication, organic groceries, vane clothing accessories, 24/7/365 sports...and honestly, I'm not so sure how I'm handling it.  This is completely natural, right?  One thing that I do know, is that I am blessed to be surrounded by so much love and support.  The lead-up to this adventure has been unbelievably humbling, yet boundlessly uplifting.


The past few weeks in Oklahoma City were truly a testament to what makes that place so special, and no matter where I end up at the end of this journey, these last three years in the Sooner State will be an experience I'll always cherish.  OKC, you accepted me when I constantly rejected (more like, insulted) you, and you loved me in my darkest days.  As I took inventory of my time in Oklahoma, I really struggled to find accomplishment.  Seriously.  From October 2010 to January 2014, I never got promoted, I didn't earn an additional degree, I gained 20 lbs, and I got divorced.  Not exactly setting the world ablaze.  What you taught me though is that life achievements cannot only be judged on a single forward/backward plane.  There's a second plane: depth.  While you could argue about my progression, digression, or stagnicity over the past 3+ years, one thing is inarguable; depth has been added to my life.  With that depth I now understand what an authentic relationship/friendship looks like.  With that depth, I found grace.  With that depth, I grew to appreciate romance.  With that depth, I rediscovered faith.  With that depth, I now go to serve with purpose. 


In the quest for this depth, I have made serious mistakes in the last few years.  One, in particular, I've struggled with quite a lot.  In my recently-divorced bachelorhood, I was a very bitter and confused soul.  As a byproduct of my resentment towards, well, everything, I hurt a lot of people.  A lot of spectacularly beautiful, caring, smart women invested in me, and I did nothing for them but leverage our interactions for my own selfish reasons.  That's not who I am, that's not who I want to be, and I am still deeply sorry.  I left OKC with a feeling of sheer disgust at how I've treated some people, but I also left with endless encouragement.  The list really is too long to list, but if we met for lunch dinner, drinks, brunch, or any type of interaction with anybody this last month or so, I am thankful for you.  Three groups of people deserve special recognition, though.  First, the young adults of FBC-OKC.  I've said it over and over before, but when I look at that group, I clearly see the face of God.  There isn't a collection of people with more zeal to serve, a greater capacity to love, and a higher regard for redemption than you all.  I know my inclusion in your group hasn't always been easy.  I've been very open about my struggles with faith and my skepticism of organized religion, I have a mile-long list of flaws, and I often needed much more than I gave.  Despite all of that, you still accepted me for who I was, you wrapped your arms around me when I needed it most, and you did so without a hint of judgment or condemnation.  For that, I am eternally grateful.  Second, are two of the best friends any guy could ask for in Kevin Howerton and Marques Johnson.  When a pretentious East Coast kid showed up, you took me in and gave me identity.  You two were step-by-step with me in the best of times and the worst.  Whatever I needed, whenever I needed it, you stepped up.  You taught me that sometimes it's okay to slow down and enjoy life...that who I was is much more than what I do.  Most importantly, you showed me how to laugh again.  The third person who I must thank is my Andrea.  You, my dear, are a prayer answered; a dream manifested; a fantasy realized.  Your support means everything.  Strangely enough, ever since I first applied to Peace Corps 18 months ago, I knew I was going to go if offered; however, you, my love, affirmed the reason why.  I love you.


(PS: from time-to-time, if anybody in OKC wants to check-in on Andrea for me, to make sure she's eating her veggies and doing her laundry, you have my permission.  Tell her I told you so.)


I've said my good byes to Oklahoma, and now I'm in Virginia.  What a week it has been!  I was overjoyed to have dinner with my baby cousins in Roanoke on Friday night.  I love them more than I could ever imagine.  You two girls are the strongest kids I know, and it takes my breath away to be a part of your life.  Andrea flew in to surprise me and I looped her around DC to some of my favorite places...very similar to Al Pacino did around NYC in "Scent of a Woman".  We did dinner at Ebbitt, cigars at Shelly's, brunch at Georgia Brown's, and spent the afternoon with the pandas at the zoo.  It was an action-packed 24 hours!  Now, I'm here.  Typing.  Really I'm just procrastinating from packing.  I've seen other Peace Corps bloggers talk about their packing lists, but I doubt you want to hear me talk about X number of t-shirts and Y types of wool socks.  Maybe I'm wrong.  If you do, tell me, and I'll share!  If I'm being honest with myself, and being honest with you, I'm not sharing my packing list because I have yet to make one.  Yea, probably should get on that.


So my first blog post was the introduction, this one was kinda the wrap-up to the past few weeks of American life, and thankfully, from here on out, I'll be writing on matters of intrigue and substance.  I can't wait to share about life in South America...yes, complete with photos.  Also, I have decided to keep my blog at pcvcbm.blogspot.com.  If you want to comment and can't (which you can't without a Gmail account), then comment on the link I'll post to Facebook whenever there's a blog update!  Come to think of it, announcing blog updates is about all I'll be using Facebook for the next few years - which will probably please most of you.  If you want to get ahold of me, I encourage you to do so on here, by emailing me at miles.coreyb@gmail.com, or at


Corey B. Miles, PCT
Cuerpo de Paz
Casilla 17-08-8624
Quito, Ecuador
South America


That address will change, but for now all of my mail will be directed through the Peace Corps office in Ecuador.  Remember though, as of Monday afternoon, no mas cell phone.  \\


I don't mean for this post to be so dripping with sap, because I'm moving, not dying; however, I've just been so overwhelmed by everyone's encouragement and love.  I'm sorry Lou Gehrig, but because of amazing people in OKC, Roanoke, Lynchburg, DC, Charlottesville, Richmond, Hampden-Sydney, and places in between...I am the luckiest man on the face of the Earth.


Good night everyone, and I look forward to talking to you next from the Southern Hemisphere!